A Life Deserved
by ShadowPassinThru
Summary: Updated 10-3-02(Sirius/Remus SLASH) Set after GoF. Sirius goes to Remus to find that he had been captured by some townspeople...people that fear the new Dark Ages.
1. Default Chapter

Title: A Life Deserved  
Author: DarkAngelGirl (Kayla)  
Summary: After GoF, Sirius goes to alert Remus of Voldemort's rising to find that he'd been captured by a bunch of worried townspeople.   
Feedback: I'd love to here what people think. Please review or if you'd like to talk about it email me at KAYKEL1207@msn.com   
WARNING: There is Remus/Sirius slash in this story. If that bothers you please don't read and flame me for writing it.   
Spoilers: PoA, GoF  
Rated: PG-13 since it is slash and a little violent.  
A/N: This is my first Slash fic so please tell me if it sounds too awkward.  
  
Lifehouse "Am I Ever Going to Find Out"  
  
Silence is golden  
but I think it's gonna kill me now  
Everything I've seen  
never seems to feel me now  
No one ever told me that the world  
could fall through, yeah  
  
In between this  
am I gonna find away  
to defeat this  
living inside yesterday  
I'm alive I think its time to live  
Like I am  
Am I ever gonna find out  
  
Remus Lupin unfolded the copy of the newspaper he was carrying. The headline on the front cover made him jump. He blinked and slowly read the article:  
  
"Horrific tragedy at Hogwarts school. The Hogwarts Triwizard tournament ended most terribly. In the final task their were some mysterious events involving Hogwarts champions, Cedric Digamy and Harry Potter."  
  
As he read this he felt his heart stop. He'd known that Harry had been chosen mysteriously as a fourth champion in the tournament. He had been alerted of that in a letter from Sirius not long ago and then it started showing up in almost every days paper. Had something gone wrong? He had to slow himself down in order to read the rest:  
  
"These events have left Cedric Diggory dead. Though the Minister of Magic will not release these statements as true, Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts insists that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is responsible. He went on to tell reporters that You-Know-Who has risen again. Potter turned up fine, Albus still refuses to release his accounts until "the right moment comes". Now the question is... are the Dark Ages on us once again?"  
  
He had to breath deeply to keep himself calm. He knew Dumbledore would never lie, he knew that Voldemort must be back in power yet, the idea seemed unthinkable. He knew he had to find out what happened and how he could offer his services. He went inside of his house and wrote a quick letter to Dumbledore. He headed to the post office to get it sent.  
  
"I'll do anything to help." he said as he was walking down the road "Anything, especially if it will help me get a hold on that rat Wormtail!" His words were dangerously angry. It wasn't the first time his mind raced to thoughts of Peter Pettigrew.   
  
Peter, he was once the harmless,weak boy who used to tag along with the rest of them. Now, he was the reason that his best friend James was dead, he was also the only reason that Sirius Black was still running, even though he was perfectly innocent. The very thought made him want to scream. He felt that familiar feeling of rage. He had just found out that Sirius was innocent, he'd never betrayed anyone. They'd both forgiven each other for mistakes in life... and for once in his life he thought he could be happy, happy as he was at school.  
  
'That's the only time I ever was happy', Remus thought bitterly, 'When I was with Sirius everything, even being a werewolf wasn't so bad.'  
  
He and Sirius started a real relationship in their 6th year at Hogwarts. It had taken them both that long to realize that they were meant to be together. They had been so happy and all the horrors Remus had in his life were nearly invisible. After they had been together for years Sirius had distanced himself because he thought Remus was the traitor, then he got framed and Remus thought it was him. It was all Peter's fault.  
  
"I'll get you Peter." he muttered his thoughts interrupted by the sight of the Post Office in the distance. He almost rushed to it when he heard a voice. It was his neighbor, an old wizard called Murdoc. "Uh.... hello." he said uncertainly.  
  
The man glared at him "Stop there." he said gravely "Some of us need to talk to you now Lupin." Remus couldn't help notice that he was standing at a distance and that there was a group of people far behind him.  
  
The other wizards and witches slowly closed in on him. "What is the meaning of this?" he asked angrily.  
  
"Remus Lupin..." a young man said in a grim voice "Always the outsider. I never guessed how outside you were. Old Murdoc here says he saw something odd... through your back window a couple of weeks ago. Full grown werewolf... it was a full moon, you live alone, you know what I want to here."  
  
"A werewolf?" he asked in disbelief that anyone had seen him. He had been practicing and had learned to make the Wolfsbane potion. He had sat in his bedroom the whole time, harmless."You believe the old man? Everyone in the community has something against me.... how could any of you take his word for it?"  
  
"You-Know-Who has returned." spoke up a small witch "It's a fact.... I was a young girl during those times. All evil will return to support him. None of us put it past a thing like you to do just that! I won't live them again."  
  
At that the very young woman raised her wand at him. "Those were horrible times..." he said sympathetically "but even if i was a werewolf.... you all know that Werewolves aren't evil by choice. One would never join Voldemort."  
  
His use of the name made everyone gasp in shock. The witch stuttered but then yelled out "He is evil, as you are evil! It is our duty to take evil down, before it takes us."  
  
He knew he was in terrible trouble but he started to feel self pity. "So, I am a werewolf!" he yelled "I was bitten when I was young. It wasn't my choice... and I'm human at the moment..."  
  
"Are you really?!?" old Murdoc asked bitterly.  
  
He was too busy feeling sorry for himself. Feeling the old pain of his life come in fresh and new he did not see the man behind him. The man yelled out a curse. Remus hit the ground stunned. The impact on the back of his head hurt... he felt like his head had exploded. He could feel the stabbing pains in his head yet he could not force his eyes open to look around. He felt several blows hit him in the head and he could not stay conscious. He drifted off. The men and women picked him up and carried him down another winding road.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Sirius had duties to perform for Dumbledore. He had all ready alerted everyone else he had to and now he was heading to the home of Remus Lupin, where he was to lie low until further instructions. He really anticipated going back.  
  
Remus ... the man's name alone was enough to bring every childhood memory back. They flowed through his head so fast he could feel each emotion and it was almost too much. He'd lost a lot of these great feelings in Azkaban. Growing up, taking chances, pulling pranks. They had been so carefree. James had loved the fun of it all, Sirius loved the danger, Peter did it because the rest of them did. Remus, he however was different.... he always took the jokes so seriously, so carefully, analyzing them so closely. "Be careful." he'd always warn but then a smile would cross his face and he'd say "but let's do it now!"  
  
Of the four boys he'd always been the best with emotions. He showed his care so openly and was always willing to listen.  
  
That was why Sirius Black fell in love with him. It started after James had realized Remus had a secret. Together Sirius and James had figured it out piece by piece.   
  
Remus was so ashamed when they found out. Being a werewolf shamed him more than anything. Peter had severe difficulty adjusting to it and James was indifferent about it but Sirius cared a lot and offered full support.  
  
He went to talk to Remus soon after and told him that he didn't care at all and that he still loved him. He'd been in love at that moment but it would still take years for them to admit it.  
  
Then they all decided to learn to become Animagi for Remus. He'd been so grateful to them... and they had the most fun in their lives. It was an amazing last two years at school. Sirius sighed as he remembered the days that he and Remus were lovers, the thought they'd never leave each other. They were the best years ever but soon it was to end.  
  
James ended up marrying his girlfriend Lily and they had a son. It was soon discovered that someone was a spy for Voldemort ... Sirius had no reason to believe it could have been Peter, he was so weak.... the only explanation available was that his own love Remus, was working for the Dark Side. He left him immediately with a weak explanation that they could no longer be together. He didn't give a reason.   
  
So he went and switched the Potter's secret-keeper to Peter. It was a safety precaution, he though it was the perfect idea to keep Lily and James protected. Then if the spy told Voldemort he'd go after the wrong man. The perfect plan.... yet he ended up getting them killed. He wouldn't have ever suggested it but he had to think of the future. If his only love was a Death Eater... he might have given away the location of Lily and James. He didn't think he could find it in himself to not tell Remus the truth. Pet had been the real traitor. Sirius had gone to Azkaban knowing that he had left Remus for a false reason.... a horrible thing to think. Sometimes the Dementors there could sense his agony over losing Remus. Sometimes that was when he felt more insane.  
  
As he knocked on the door and got no response, all the memories went away quickly.  
  
He knocked even harder. No answer at all. He decided that even though the reason Remus was gone was probably easily explained, he still better check it out. He was worried and not used to it. 'In the old days' he thought to himself 'Remus used to worry about me'  
  
He transformed into the big black dog and crawled around to the back door of the house. Nothing. Then he was big marks on the dirt path leading from Lupin's house. He ran further down the street, almost to the town. He saw big marks in the mud, footprints. He sniffed the ground. Remus had been there. All the time that Sirius spent as a dog paid off... he learned that people have very specific scents. He knew Remus too well.... he'd been a dog around his friends too many times... it was so easy.  
  
He changed himself back to his human form so he could get a better look. Several bushes on the side of the path were torn and rocks were thrown everywhere. It looked as though there had been a big struggle.  
  
There had been a fight here. Even as a human, Sirius had a high sense of smell and the smell here was recognizable. He could smell blood... and anger.  
  
He followed the footprints and smells to a small house where an old lady was standing on the porch. He quickly pulled his cloak up over his head quickly. He was still on the run, he needed to hide but he still needed to talk to her.  
  
"Excuse me madam?" he asked her raising his voice rather high "Did some people come by here? A large crowd?"  
  
"You bet they did!" she yelled enthusiastically "Good citizens they are. They found out one of our neighbors was a werewolf. Can you imagine?!? Right down the road."  
  
Sirius stopped breathing. Remus, if the villagers found out they must have taken him. "Really..." Sirius stated with fake interest "Why did they do it?"  
  
"Werewolves, just another form of evil. Now that You-Know-Who has returned, we need to wipe out the evil, before it can join him."  
  
"Where did they go?" he asked pulling his cloak tighter, concealing his face.  
  
"Down South Cramson road." the woman said softly "They're taking it down to the old jail. Used it back in the old Dark Ages... did you hear me son? They are here once more, You-Know-Who is back. I can feel it. We've all heard, all his evil associates will be killed."  
  
"Thank you." he said "I'll do my part to help."  
  
"Be careful." she warned "Pull your cloak down for your own sake. Our men and women won't take to strange characters."  
  
He nodded and was off. It all came together, Remus, the struggle, and the blood... he ran even faster. By the time he got to South Cramson he was panting but he did not stop. It was clear that Remus was in a lot of trouble.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Remus awoke and groaned in pain. Had these people been beating him up since he was knocked out? His hand instantly went to his head, it hurt more than anything he'd ever felt before. He looked up above him.  
  
"It's awake." said one of the people. They were still there, surrounding him. "Where.... are you planning to join your master? We know you are, so you better tell us where the evil is? Locate some evil activity for us, and maybe we wont kill you."  
  
"I'll say it again..." Remus was calm even though he hurt so badly he could harder speak. He lifted the upper part of his body weakly and then yelled "I do not work for him and I would never! Just because I can lose control doesn't make me .... evil!"  
  
A man took out his wand and muttered inn a low voice. He almost yelled out when he was thrown against the stone wall. He dropped to the floor. He tried to pull away but he was put down when someone hit him in the stomach. It took him a few seconds to realize from the intense pain that along with the sharp punch he had been stabbed. He was now bleeding heavily and he could feel it, all around him.  
  
He was now sure that these people intended to kill him. It was harder and harder for him to fight back... the self pity that he always felt for himself came back full force. So what if they killed him? He'd always wanted to die for being such a thing, maybe they were doing someone a favor here. Werewolves were killed all the time and now more than ever, it seemed like he would not be the last.  
  
Someone had hit him with something hard. It must have been one of the rusty bars from the rotting jail cell. Questions flooded from the people, they were just scared of being killed by the Dark Lord. He didn't listen. He was in horrible pain, he could hardly see straight. He must have blanked out some of the time when they had been torturing him and until know he didn't realize how badly he was hurt. He must have been hit many times because he felt numerous bruises on his body. He felt his consciousness slip away, the giant stab wound in his stomach had caused him to lose so much blood. He slipped downward across the floor. He didn't know who would help him now.  
  
~*~*~*~   
  
Sirius had gotten down the street. The jail building was easily recognizable. It was the oldest building on the street. He decided that there was no time to transform to dog and sneak in. He had to go in as he was... if they saw his face it would be too bad. He'd rather have people say they'd spotted Sirius Black then know his dog form. It was his only secret.  
  
The first humans he saw were two wizards guarding the doors. He knew he could take them out quickly. He moved straight up to them. When one of them, a very tall wizard wearing long green robes saw him he yelled out.   
  
Sirius raised a wand at them. "It's him!" one yelled "The Death Eater! It's.... it's Sirius Black."  
  
Both men stood. Sirius didn't need his wand at all. The men were big and had a lot of strength but Sirius was light and fast. He kicked one man in the leg and he went crashing down, his partner fell on top of him. He used his wand and tied both men up magically, they'd live but they wouldn't be free for a while.  
  
He moved down the dusty building. He saw the activity at the end of the hall. About seven or eight people sitting talking. They were standing around a cell. He caught some of the conversations:  
  
"Why don't we just kill it?"  
  
"Did you hear it talking to us? Like it did nothing wrong... amazing!"  
  
"I'm so glad we got it, it lived a few homes away from me."  
  
He snuck around. A few of the people had their backs turned to him. He muttered a useful curse he suddenly remembered from his days at Hogwarts. The three fell forward and then he was noticed. A cry of "Sirius Black." echoed among the remaining four. Two ran out of the building fearfully but two remained.   
  
"So..." one cried trembling "The monster lied then... now we find You-Know-Who's top man here to save him."  
  
"Expelliarmus!" Sirius yelled and the man's wand flew away. The two man were scared now.  
  
"So.... so k... kill us." the other stuttered boldly "There are... more of us.... all around Black. You'll get taken down."  
  
"Not today." he whispered grimly and muttered under his breath. They were both tied up also.  
  
He rushed to the cell by the wall. "Alohamora." The lock clicked open. He pushed the door open and rushed in.   
  
He saw Remus immediately. He knelt down by the other man's side and squinted. He looked him over and frowned... how could these people have the hearts to do this. He reached out to touch him and better analyze the wounds when Remus awoke.  
  
His eyes flicked open but he could hardly see. His first thought was that he was hallucinating because above him was Sirius Black. "Sirius," he whispered weakly "No.... it can't be... he can't be here... no way."  
  
"Yes it can be." Sirius replied "I'm right here..."  
  
Now, though hurt and in a lot of pain, Remus was wide awake. He tried to sit up so he could see better but the stab wound in his lower stomach made him stop and fall backwards. Sirius caught him before he hit his head.  
  
"Slow down all right?" he said concerned "You're in no condition to be doing that. I'm going to get you out of here before they all come around. Just relax and I will handle it."  
  
He listened to Sirius and sunk back while the other man made a plan. "So..." he muttered closing his eyes and trying hard to distract himself, so he wouldn't lose consciousness again "Tell me Sirius .... h .... how did you get.... how did you find me?"  
  
Sirius sat back down next to him. He looked at the man he had known so much about as a boy and smiled. He put his hand on his old love's head. "Dumbledore told me to find you... I'm sure you know why."  
  
"Yeah..." his reply was bitter "I get the idea. Voldemort is back... the new war, I suppose?"  
  
His bitterness surprised Sirius a lot. He had always been so light in the past... made the better of everything. He realized that he had bent over and was looking straight into his eyes. "Don't be upset." he said softly "It will work out Moony, somewhere deep inside you and I are still Marauders... we always got through before."  
  
"Before..." Remus repeated the words. Before was so easy. He was too wrapped up in his thoughts and his physical weakness to realize the Sirius had kissed him on the top of his head. Finally he went back to his senses.   
  
Maybe, if Sirius believed they could live through it... like they did before... maybe it also meant that he believed in other aspects of the past. With all the strength he could manage... he slowly raised his left arm. With all the force he could manage he pushed Sirius lower.   
  
As Sirius felt the weak yet amazing force push him downward he knew what Remus meant. The past could live in the present. He allowed the hand to guide him downward and he kissed the man hard, on the lips.   
  
It was just the same as those days when Remus would come back to his true from after transforming... he'd be extremely weak and visibly exhausted, but he'd always felt better with Sirius there. Even now, the one simple kiss made all his pain disappear.  
  
"Wow." Sirius muttered under his breath as they pulled away reluctantly.  
  
" I know what you mean." Remus agreed. He felt tired suddenly and said alertly "Sirius, I don't think I can get out of here with you. It'll be too much."  
  
"You can do anything, if I say you can." Sirius was sharp but he agreed with one fact. Those townspeople had done some terrible things... he wouldn't be able to make it. "Where are you hurt most?" he asked knowing it would make all the difference in getting to safety.  
  
He didn't have to say a word. They way he carried his body and the panting showed Sirius clearly. He touched his hands to the other man's stomach. "I need to see how bad it is." he said softly looking at the blood, now on his hands.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Remus cringed as Sirius helped him take off his shirt. He knew that is was bad. It didn't take a genius to figure out.  
  
He heard Sirius talking "Listen to me." he said quietly "You know I failed healing charms at Hogwarts ..... but I need to do something about this or we won't be able to go on. I'm sorry if I hurt you, you know I'm trying."  
  
"All right." he replied "You know I trust you Sirius."  
  
Sirius tried his best to at least stop the most terrible wound. He ended up at least sealing it. "I hope that helps you a little..." he said "They'll do better late but for now."  
  
"Thank you." was the only reply.  
  
He was still too weak to be magically transported. It would be too much strain too ask him to bear. Sirius decided that he needed to physically move Remus to somewhere that was safe. They could go from there.   
  
He summoned his strength and lifted him up as gently as possible. He felt the other man's arms go around his neck. He moved as fast as he possibly could. He didn't have a clue where they could go. He could not risk going back to the house Remus had left alone for days... they had to get away. The biggest problem though was the fact that he knew they couldn't go on without more help.  
  
They stopped for a moment, they were deep in a dark forest. Animals howled and shrieked all around them. Remus opened his eyes and looked into the sky. "Oh... oh no... " he muttered "Sirius, tell me it's not the 24th please...."  
  
Sirius did not speak. The full moon was to happen soon. "No.... not tonight... not now, I can't do this now."  
  
He was immediately picked up again and Sirius wordlessly walked into a cave in the side of a hill. "Where are we?" he was asked.  
  
"I stayed here on my way to see you."   
  
As Sirius put him down he could only sigh. "Why tonight... I can't do it tonight. Sirius, you know I can't."  
  
"It will be hard." Sirius replied "I'll be right here though."  
  
"I miss you being there...."  
  
" I miss it too. It was really wonderful.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It started as usual and in seconds he was a full grown werewolf. The last thing he thought as a human was that Sirius was changing right next to him.   
  
He lost all human senses. He growled uncontrollably at the black dog, he didn't want to hurt it but he knew the wolf did not want it there. The dog leapt backwards and barked ordering him to back off. His human wounds did not affect him in this state but he tried to hold in in his animal mind to remember that something was wrong. He was weak, something was very wrong.  
  
~~*~~*~~~*~~~*~~  
  
It was a very long rough time. When Remus took back his own form he saw Sirius transforming back next to him. "How are you?" Sirius asked immediately "That was a rough one. Are you all right?"  
  
"I.... I...." he replied but he couldn't speak. He felt dizzy, the whole cave was spinning. "Something's wrong with me.... I don't know."  
  
Looking on, Sirius knew that something really wasn't right. "You look so weakened... when those people caught you, do you remember them using a curse, or a potion on you?"  
  
"I wouldn't remember..." he gasped out "I was unconscious most of the time..."  
  
He reached out and held his hand. "I need to get you help. I got to leave you here... I'll only be a minute, I am going to apparate just down the road from the Hogwarts grounds, Dumbledore said that if I got into any trouble to get down there as soon as I could."   
  
The look on both of their faces showed that they did not care to part. There was so much that could go very wrong. What if someone looking for the "werewolf" found him in the cave? Or, what if Sirius was caught? So much could go wrong...  
  
"Wait." Remus was calm yet shaking when he spoke up.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"I.... I love you. I thought it was over but I still feel the same. Promise that if we live... you'll talk to me about this?"  
  
"Of course." Sirius said smiling sadly "I still love you like I did when we were sixteen, we could get through anything then. We can get through anything now."  
  
He disappeared.   
  
  
A/N: So, how was it? What do you think? I love Remus/Sirius fic now and I hope you guys liked it. I should have the next chapter up in a few days. It's almost ready but I want to give a few days to see what you think so REVIEW! 


	2. Help

Title: A Life Deserved  
Chapter two: Help   
Ch Summary: Sirius gets help from Albus Dumbledore. Remus doesn't want to let go of Sirius, they have their talk.  
A/N: Thanks for the comments everyone. I was so nervous about what everyone would think... I'm glad you liked it. Thanks to: kat, Lady Geuna, KateMarie, and Niriko Inverse   
  
Sirius appeared right outside the Hogwarts grounds. The castle hung in the distance. He took his dog form and ran as fast as he could. To anyone, he would have looked like a big black blur. He made his way to the back entrance.  
  
The door was unlocked and unguarded. It was the Summer vacations for the students so it was very easy to get in. With a simple push, the door flung open.  
  
He rushed up flights of stairs. He nearly missed being seen by several roaming teachers. Surely, seeing a dog roaming the empty halls would have caused some notice. He reached the place that he knew as the Headmaster's office. He looked around and barked loudly. At once the doors flicked open. Once he walked in, they snapped shut and locked magically.   
  
Dumbledore was staring at him questioningly "Sirius, what is it?" Then noticing that he was talking to a dog he added "It's safe now."  
  
Instantly the dog became a man. Once again he was asked "What's wrong?"  
  
He breathed deeply and then started "Sir, I followed your orders. I alerted everyone... they're all coming soon. But then I went... and Remus ... he..."  
  
Dumbledore sat calmly listening as Sirius caught his breath and started to continue. Sirius looked at him and boldly said "With all respect sir, the information on Voldemort that you released... it's caused a panic."  
  
"That I expected" he replied "A general fear or panic produces quicker reaction. Reaction from crowds will help on the way to...."  
  
"Reaction!" Sirius was getting angry "You expect a lot of good from people don't you? People and their reactions are the reason that... they're the reason that I think... that I think Remus could be dying."  
  
Dumbledore looked up sharply. Sirius quickly explained the details. There was not much time to explain.  
  
"From what you have explained to me, I would believe that one of the villagers may have used a weakening spell. I would think the "Artofal" curse. If that is true then... it could kill him. What we need to do is get him back here soon. I know our school's Charms teacher should know the counter curse. We have to though. He looked better after he transformed though?"  
  
"Yes..." Sirius said "He had been really hurt... but on the outside... he looked better. Not inside though..."  
  
His voice broke and Dumbledore looked at him sympathetically. Both men left the grounds of the school and appeared at the base of the cave again.  
  
Upon arrival they knew that Remus was no better off. "It's the "artifal"...." Dumbledore whispered to Sirius and then he bent over to Remus and asked "Can you hear us now?"  
  
~~~  
  
Remus looked up to see Sirius and Professor Dumbledore. "Yes I can." he said. He could hear them but he really didn't understand what was going on. His surroundings, the people around him, why he was there... it really wasn't making any sense.  
  
"All right... that's good. Just listen all right? I'm going to get you to the Hogwarts castle. Someone there will know what to do. Keep your mind on Sirius. Sirius, I need you to talk to him all right? Keep his mind on something or else.... just do it."  
  
Sirius was very glad that Dumbledore was in so much control. He'd have lost it under all the pressure. Of course Dumbledore had everything in order. The man knew a lot of good healing spells and Remus became healthy enough on the outside to be magically transported. He talked as often as he could, making sure that he got replies. Then Remus said "When I .... If I get out of this... I need to talk to you. I made a decision."  
  
"We can talk about a lot later all right." he said "Let's just get through this now..."   
  
Once the got to the school it was time for Sirius to leave them. "Go to my office." Dumbledore instructed. It will lock you in and no one will come in there. You'll be safe until we figure it out.  
  
~~~  
Sirius heard the door lock behind him. He wanted to scream. They expected him to sit here and wait, not knowing what was happening. When you care that much about someone... and know that they are in so much trouble, yet you can do nothing, it kills you. 'He will be just fine' Sirius said to himself 'He's strong. He always was... '  
  
He sat in that office for hours. It felt like those long hours in Azkaban. He knew he'd be out soon in this case though... yet the fear was just the same.   
  
Finally Dumbledore arrived. He was smiling "Good news" he said "It's fine. Professor Flitwick was told the story, Not the whole story of course, but either way he figure out the counter curse. It will be all right."  
  
Sirius sighed "Sir, you don't know how... how grateful I am... for all your help."  
  
Dumbledore nodded "I understand Sirius." He looked meaningful when he said gently "I've understood since you were boys. All four of you showed it but you and Remus mostly. That love that's there... that's a big thing. A really big thing. Now I arranged it so you could get in without being seen now. He wants to talk to you. Especially about an offer I've made him."  
  
~~~~~~~  
Sirius entered the room. Remus looked up and smiled. "How are you?" Sirius asked him, he was also smiling. How could he mot be? They were both so relieved.  
  
"Good, thanks to you." he spoke happily but knowing someone for so long, you know when they are troubled.  
  
"That's so good... you looked so terrible... it was just... too much."  
  
"Calm down Sirius. I'm all right... this parts over."   
  
"You used to do that all the time." Sirius said finding himself laughing.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You always were the one taking everything calmly. None of us could get out of the messes we caused... except you."  
  
This caused them both to laugh at themselves "We were really odd then." Remus mused out aloud "I think we still are."  
  
"Let's talk." Sirius said "About now, not then but now... so what did the headmaster offer you?"  
  
Remus sighed. He didn't know how he was going to explain, even to Sirius, the horrible conflict he was feeling. "He offered me the job at Hogwarts again. He says that people need to accept differences now .... and he though it'd be a good idea."  
  
"It is!" Sirius was supportive. He smiled but both he and Remus were thinking the same thing "I could tell you loved that job... don't you want it?"  
  
"Of course I do." he replied smiling but looking suddenly tired "but when you saved me... I knew there's something more important."  
  
Yes, he decided that was how to say it. For years he'd had so much gone wrong in his life. Suffering all those years, one thing in his life could help. This Hogwarts job meant a lot to him but not as much as Sirius. He wanted it but only on one condition. He had to be selfish this once, and get what he wanted.  
  
"Do you mean..." Sirius asked in disbelief.  
  
"Yes I do." he said "I'm not starting that job unless I have you. We can't let those horrible thirteen years ruin everything. Don't you want it... don't you want to... well be with me?"  
  
"Of course I want it." he replied firmly "I love you. I did all those years in Azkaban. It was always you... but now I'm torn up cause... I can't have you now."  
  
"You can have me,"Remus was smiling nervously, scared to tell Sirius what he planned. "I love you and the only way we can be together is if you are cleared... there is only one way to do that... you know what I mean."  
  
When Sirius stayed silent for a few moments, Remus had to sigh "You do know... I want the man that destroyed all we had together locked away or killed. No one is going to try anything... no one except those he hurt most."  
  
"You are not getting yourself killed. Let me do that! No way..."  
  
"Yes..." he said "All my life I never stood up for myself... but now I'm going to. When Peter killed Lily and James, I lost them and you... I lost everything. I know Lily and James are gone. I can't change that but I can get you back. I will cause I'm not going on this way."  
  
He paused and silently added "You want to help me or not?I've all ready talked to Dumbledore and he said that he'd give me the job at the school in the middle of the year and he'd ask you to work with me. "  
  
Sirius looked at him. He'd never seen Remus acting so demanding or impulsive. It was very different. Not being on the run anymore, being with the one person he loved most, and teaching at the school his godson went to... it seemed like a dream. "All right." he said decisively. It was time to take action. "Let's go for it. What do we got to lose?"  
  
"Nothing... maybe everything?"Remus said softly "This will be nothing.... compared to all we've been through."  
  
Sirius nodded. It had been a lot, it still wasn't over... maybe they could make it be?  
  
"Remember in our last year at school." Remus said suddenly "You told me nothing could make you stop loving me... well... terrible things happened and you did stop. So tell me Padfoot, now that the hell is almost gone, do you still feel the way you did?"  
  
"Of course..." Sirius said softly "How could I not? I've been in love with you for years and years, that doesn't change."  
  
"I was worried you didn't." he said slightly "I lived a year wondering where you were. The one owl you sent me was hardly nothing... I'm tired of worrying."  
  
"Remus," he asked "Do they know where Peter is? Does anyone? How are we going to..."  
  
"Calm down." he said "Please, it's so upsetting... I got some information after they cured me. I was told of a place Voldemort was expected to be and I have a horrible feeling that upon finding Voldemort we will find Peter."  
~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~  
  
Lifehouse "Am I Ever Gonna Find Out?"   
  
Patience can wait for now  
I think I've waited for too long  
you always gave a choice  
all my life has been slippin through your hands  
  
  
A/N: So? Any suggestions anyone? I am new to Sirius/Remus fic but I love them so much as a couple!! 


	3. Desperate Measures

Title: A Life Deserved  
Chapter Three: Desperate Measures  
Chapter summary: Plans are underway to capture Peter, but does Sirius want to risk Remus?  
A/N: Thanks to those who commented. Great ideas. Thanks to Kat whose wonderful idea is used in this chapter.  
  
"You really think that this is a good idea?" Sirius asked Professor Dumbledore for the third time "Sometimes, Remus, he acts like he can handle more than he can. He might not be ready for this... he's too weak."  
  
"Are you asking me to forbid him to go?"  
  
"No... I guess no." he frowned thinking of a better way to word it "I am just afraid... we know what Harry told us. If this story is true it will be a lot more then he can handle."  
  
Dumbledore saw through everything he was trying to say "And you are fearful because he wants to do it for you?"  
  
"Uh.... yes, I guess that is it." he said softly "I can't stop him can I?"  
  
"Not likely you can..."  
  
"Can we please review what we know?" Sirius asked suddenly "I want to know what we're up against."  
  
"Sirius," he remained calm although Sirius and his constant worries were hard to deal with. "You are referring to Peter Pettigrew then, and his powers?"  
  
"Yeah," Sirius admitted "The way Harry described it was... well it was scary. I can't imagine little Wormtail with all that power."  
  
"Well..." the professor stated calmly "We know from your godson's accounts that he is now powered by a metal arm, given to him by Lord Voldemort."  
  
"Is that increased strength going to hurt us? Will it be a lot more difficult now?"  
  
"Indeed Sirius, but like you said, Remus Lupin will not be swayed by anything you say."  
  
"I hate that." Sirius muttered "Stubborn little...."  
  
But then he smiled "I think I need to talk to him before we go for this. Maybe he will get my points."  
  
"I'll arrange it Sirius." Dumbledore replied.  
  
"Thanks so much," Sirius followed Dumbledore out the room "What you've done for me is more than any man can just ask for."  
  
"You never asked me." he replied leading him into the room "Now you two talk it over and then come to me with the decision. This needs to be done soon if it is done...."  
  
~~~~  
"Sirius!" Remus felt his eyes fling open as he saw Sirius standing there.  
  
"Hello again," he said smiling a little worriedly " Can we talk for a few moments?"  
  
"Of course."   
  
Sirius moved to a chair and sat down "First, are you feeling better?"  
  
"I all ready told you Sirius." Remus replied laughing "I'm fine, I will live." It felt so good to him to be smiling again. He used to love to smile and laugh with his friends but those days were so long ago.... it seemed like nothing could bring him down at the moment.  
  
"Good, but Remus we really need to discuss Peter... we have to know that he's not the plain talentless boy we knew when we were kids."  
  
His eyes flashed angrily. "That's obvious Sirius, Wormtail is a little murderous traitor."  
  
"He also has power..." Sirius began "An increased strength given to him by Lord Voldemort. It's in his arm... the night Voldemort rose Peter cut off his own arm, tehn Lord Voldemort ....he gave him a powerful, metal arm. He's strong."  
  
"Wow." Remus was speechless "That.... that can't be good."  
  
"I don't think you should fight him Remus. You aren't strong enough and if Peter killed you... I'd never forgive myself for letting you do this."  
  
"Sirius, you never let me do this, it's my own choice. I need you now, it's hopeless... I will fight Peter to get you back, if it's necessary. Even if it kills me."  
  
"Why are you so brave?" Sirius asked angrily "Remus, I hate that! It is so annoying and I cannot stand it."  
  
"What is the matter with me being brave?" he asked "You've done nothing but be brave for so many years."  
  
"I'm used to it." Sirius said smiling but Remus knew he was joking. "I don't want to see you get killed all right?"  
  
"Too bad. Don't say another word."  
  
"This demanding act is going to drive me insane." Sirius teased.  
  
Remus couldn't help the smile on his face "Instead of worrying about me, why don't you think about what will happen if we succeed."  
  
"You mean us together?" He laughed and for a moment he felt pulled back to the old carefree days. These moments made up for the long years of suffering. He smiled and kissed his love, he did it impulsively and was shocked to find himself shaking and nervous.  
  
"Yeah I think that's what I mean. Sirius, you're shaking. Are you .... uh...nervous?"  
  
Sirius felt himself go hot and blush furiously "I'm not exactly used to this." he muttered softly and quickly "I haven't seen you for years and you know, Azkaban, years never felt anything... anything like this."  
  
"I know..."  
  
"Not going to stop you from coming to face Peter, am I?" Sirius asked one final time but he didn't even get an answer. He knew. It was too late... they decided to be together a long time ago and now they had to fulfill that.  
  
Moments later Albus Dumbledore walked into the room. "So?" he asked Sirius.  
  
"We're going for it..." Remus said softly "Unless, of course, we could be of more help other wise. In other ways."  
  
"Nonsense... you are doing me an extreme favor... in fact you both will be the first to know my secret. Hold on while I sound proof the room, no one will hear this." Quickly he sound proofed the door and them turned to them grimly.  
  
"I know," he said "Where Voldemort hides with many of his highest Death Eaters. I have not told anyone yet, in time I was going to get a group of trained and skilled witches and wizards, that is why you were to alert so many people Sirius, and go in there. This though is a perfect start."  
  
"Really?" Sirius was very surprised "Are you certain... where is it?"  
  
"I mapped out a location for you. It is miles to the North of us. I warn you... besides Death Eaters those swamp areas up there are home to many low evil creatures. Be careful."  
  
"You have any idea where this is?" Sirius asked handing the map to Remus. He looked at it and went paler. He was all ready still pale from being hurt so badly.  
  
"Yes Sirius ..." he whispered silently "I know where this place is... I went there before, it was seven years ago. I heard a lot of..."  
  
His voice lowered slightly as he said "I heard a lot of werewolves hid out down there... I was having so much trouble at the time, but it's very terrible.... it's terrible there, everyone is so hopeless and evil because they are hopeless. I couldn't stay there. I still had hope. Oh, he's right Sirius ... it's horrid."  
  
Quickly Sirius but an arm around Remus, "It's all right... don't worry... it's all right."  
  
Professor Dumbledore had gone into a state of pretending he wasn't listening. It wasn't uncommon for him to do that in the old days. He knew well what matters were private. Remus broke the awkward sounds of silence by saying "Sirius, we should do it tomorrow when it gets dark."  
  
"Are you sure we shouldn't wait until your stronger?" Sirius asked.  
  
"No. It's happening tomorrow."  
  
  
A/N: I know the chapter was very short and basically just Sirius and his doubts but next should be exciting. Please please please review. I want to see if this story is worth continuing. I'll look for some reviews then chapter 4 will go up. 


	4. When your with me

Title: A Life Deserved  
Author: Kayla (DarkAngelGirl)  
Chapter 4: When You're With me.  
A/N: Thanks to those who comment. For the rest please review this fic... please... I have a lot of fic in progress right now and I want to update the ones being read.  
  
~~*~~*~~~*~~~*~  
  
"I hate this place..." Remus stated quietly and Sirius was quick to agree. They had headed away from Hogwarts to the swampland.   
  
"Not a very happy place." Sirius said nervously.   
  
Remus smiled trying to calm himself. The night was growing steadily... it would soon be the time for action, then it would all be over. "We should go deeper into the swamps," he spoke up "You know Voldemort would only hide himself in a place where no one would dare go."  
  
Sirius nodded "Voldemort's never been up against us though. We're smarter than your average people." They looked at each other for a second and both knew what was on the other's mind. They both wanted to go and have the happy ending right away but it wasn't going to come so easily.   
  
It took several hours to get very deep. There were no human inhabitants but every now and then a figure or two was seen. Then they had to followed it for it could be a Death Eater. They finally found a clue, when it seemed like they couldn't look any more they came across a woman... or what looked like a woman but it was very hard to tell under her dark cloak. Remus nodded to Sirius and they followed her, far behind her. They saw her go up to a stone in the muddy ground and with a wave of her wand whispered "Enctycela" She disappeared down a passage.  
  
Remus smiled and nodded. This had to be it. "Let's wait twenty minutes... just to make sure and then lets go for it."  
  
Sirius nodded but nervously "I can go alone... I will if you can't..."  
  
"Honestly!" Remus nearly yelled but then shut himself up quickly "When we were kids, I needed you to protect me... I relied on you cause I wasn't the most outgoing person, I didn't stand up for myself then, but I've... grown up."  
  
Sirius looked back apologetically and nodded "I'm so sorry Remus, I'm just not used to this... all those years."  
  
"It's all right Sirius." he said softly. He couldn't help but forgive him, that was the thing about Sirius ... you could never stay mad at him long.  
  
"Really," Sirius replied "It's been long.... I don't always know how to do things anymore."  
  
Back when they were young Remus had been very quiet and shy. When they admitted how they felt Sirius was the first and he was always the one to push the relationship... so it was a shock to them both now when Remus looked at Sirius and simply said "You know I really love you." Then he kissed him and it was hard... unlike his usual tendencies to be gentle. He knocked Sirius off of his feet. They stayed that way for a long time. Neither dared move.  
  
"You know, I'm not scared at all." Remus spoke up pulling Sirius' arm around him. "We might be facing the most evil time has knnown but I'm not scared. How do you do that to me?"  
  
"I don't know but it's time..." They looked at each other. It would be happening now.   
  
They followed the path of the witch. Sirius went up to it and said silently "Enct-tycela." Nothing happened.   
  
"Let me try," Remus said moving Sirius out of the way. He waved his wand "Enctycela," he whispered and the hole once again opened once again. He blushed as Sirius looked very impressed.  
  
It looked as though they were heading down into a large dungeon. They were trying very hard to keep themselves quiet. They turned a corner at the end of the hall. They heard voices and Sirius motioned for them to hide in the corner.  
  
The voices were yelling. One voice that sounded like a young man yelled: "Where is he?"  
  
A female voice agreed angrily and then they heard a familiar stutter "Where... wherever the Dark Lord is... he's there for a reason. He told us to wait... you know how strong he is."  
  
"No," Sirius whispered softly. Remus turned around and nodded. It was undeniably Peter Pettigrew. They both were in shock that the answer came so easily. No wait or plan, Peter was in the same room.  
  
"It seems to easy." Remus whispered "There's not even time for a proper plan."  
  
Sirius agreed but he stepped in front of Remus and motioned for him to follow and get his wand out. "We're going in now." he said gruffly "Watch out for sudden attacks."  
  
They moved left and were in the room. They Death Eaters were facing the other way. Sirius muttered under his breath and a spell hit them hard. "Wow," Remus said not knowing Sirius to be so strong.   
  
The spell did not affect Wormtail. He turned around and his eyes filled with shock. "You," he said in utter disbelief.  
  
"Yes us Peter," Remus looked at him in disgust "Your old friends here to finish what you started."  
  
"We always were cleaning up your messes," Sirius said "Unfortunately now I do have to get you."  
  
He got over the shock of seeing them and laughed. His fellow Death Eaters were still very dazed by the spell. "Great confusing charm Sirius," he laughed evilly "but you two can't boss me around anymore."  
  
Sirius furiously thought of a spell. He concentrated hard "Confundus..." he yelled but it didn't work.   
  
"See, I'm the strong one now Sirius Black," Wormtail was happy "And they put you in Azkaban. I'm the real evil here."  
  
"We'll be sure to tell the guards at Azkaban that," Remus said and then a wordless spell shot from his wand and threw Peter down.  
  
"Good... one." Wormtail was breathless "At least some of us were learning things."  
  
The other Death Eaters were coming out of the confusing curse. They were turning on them, Sirius well knew that if one decided to kill them they'd die no matter what defenses they had. They had to at least try though. Trying was the only thing left.  
  
Wormtail smiled at them and flexed his arm. "What are you going to do?" he asked "There is no way out for everyone... someone's gonna die."  
  
Sirius, in one second was on top of Peter with his wand pointed at his throat. Remus turned to the other Death Eaters. He knew he couldn't take all three down but he was pretty good and could give Sirius the edge over Peter. The female tried a stunning spell but Remus was too fast for her and her spell backfired on her. She fell to the ground.  
  
Sirius had Peter pinned on the floor. He looked down and growled "All you did to us..." he whispered "You're going straight to Azkaban Peter. No one deserves that Peter... but you."  
  
"Yeah," Peter whispered "Me?" Then suddenly he reached up and grabbed Sirius by the throat. The strength in his arm was overwhelming. He was being choked.  
  
Remus caught on very quickly and he went to pull Peter off Sirius. He threw a punch straight at Peter's face and Sirius pulled free. He was gasping "Thanks..." he said quickly and turned on Peter. He had an idea.  
  
He darted to one side and Peter followed him. Peter tried to grab Sirius again but this time Sirius quickly ducked against a wall. With all his strength, Peter grabbed for Sirius but accidentally threw his arm straight through the stone wall. He was stuck with one arm inside the wall. He struggled furiously but Sirius had the advancement now. He was on top of Peter, whose only power, his arm, was stuck inside the stone. Remus turned to Sirius and they both used a stunning spell. Peter fell, his arm still trapped. The two unaffected Death Eaters turned on them. Sirius still stared at Peter watchfully but Remus turned to face them furiously.  
  
He had barely time to curse one of those attackers when Peter revived and had his arm free. He had his wand at Sirius and was looking ready to kill. "I'm going to finally kill you." he said softly.  
  
Remus tried to get to them but the tallest man was holding him off. He fought against it angrily, tearing at the man who held him. He kicked the man and rushed to help Sirius. Peter raised his wand to use the killing curse on Sirius but he never got the words out. "Ava..." he began but Remus had jumped on top of him cutting it off. Peter lost his only chance to kill either man.   
  
Sirius sank to the ground. Peter had choked him a lot, he sat on the ground gasping. Then he found his strength and stood . He looked at Remus who had successfully knocked Peter out without a spell. "God, thank you Remus ..." he said smiling in disbelief.  
  
"Hold on Sirius," Remus said nodding toward the one man who was not unconscious.  
  
Both turned on him, he looked very afraid. He'd seen what they did to Peter and he was afraid. Remus looked to Sirius for an opinion.   
  
Sirius then spoke to the man "You're going to Azkaban with the rest of your lot... and your going to tell them everything you know. Starting with me: Where is Voldemort?"  
  
The man stuttered "Lord... he... we don't know... he's been gone for a month. Big plans."  
  
Out of no where the man raised a wand to them. Sirius countered his attack almost before he made it. He was beaten.  
  
"How'd you know what he was going to do?" Remus asked.  
  
"Thirteen years in Azkaban and I know Death Eaters." Sirius muttered "They are all the same."  
  
"Siri... are you all right?" Remus asked suddenly noticing that he looked bad.  
  
"I'm all right," he replied "Tired a little, but good... we won tonight. That's all that matters."  
  
~*~*~*~ A month later ~*~*~*~  
  
Remus laughed to see the headlines in the news paper. It said: "Black proven innocent and free."  
  
He really wanted to cry. It was over, Sirius Black was free.... they had to wait a whole two months after Peter was turned in, to sort out legal issues but it was over. There was one thing though... one Death Eater, the female had escaped and now word around Azkaban was: Remus was wanted by Voldemort. Getting Peter was a blow against him... Peter knew a lot of Voldemort's secrets, which were pulled right out of him with threats of truth   
serum. Peter was smarter than that, better give out most of the secrets then spill everything.   
  
Sirius came from over his shoulder. "Hey, look at that..." he said smiling "There's a picture of us on the front page."  
  
Remus had to laugh, they were on the front page of the newspaper. Both smiling and waving at the photographer.  
  
"I have to admit Moony," Sirius spoke solemnly "I was convinced that I was going to die... or worse lose you. I haven't slept for weeks... losing you would have destroyed me."  
  
Remus pulled Sirius to his side and held him for a moment. "Losing you," he whispered into his love's ear "Would have killed me so both of us would have died any way."  
  
He had his arms around Sirius and then put his head on his shoulder. "Oh Sirius," he said "Neither of us died this time... it's all better now. And now I've got what I want.... you."  
  
Sirius kissed him furiously... Remus sighed happily speaking between kisses "You... you know Padfoot... we're teachers now. This won't be acceptable.... imagine the kids."  
  
"Who gives a damn what the kids think?" Sirius replied slowly "All I want is you. I've been deprived of my love for thirteen years.... and I wont take it anymore Remus."  
  
They kissed again and then Remus had to break away. "Siri," he said "We have our first class at Hogwarts tomorrow."  
  
"I know." he replied. He realized that Remus was nervous. "Don't be scared..." he whispered "From all I learned, the kids loved you. You were the best teacher they've ever had."  
  
"I'm scared of other things too." Remus said suddenly "What if Voldemort is out to get me? Or you? What if one of us..."  
  
"Not now." Sirius said "For once, let's live today please."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
It was the Christmas feast. The students of Hogwarts made lots of noise crowding into the great hall.  
  
"Students please," Albus Dumbledore said with a smile "I have an announcement for all of you."  
  
The great hall went quiet. Harry Potter and his friends had been talking loudly about how his godfather had been freed. "You think you'll live with him Harry?" Ron asked quietly.  
  
"I dunno." Harry whispered "I think maybe, but I haven't heard from him."   
  
Then Dumbledore had made his announcement and they stopped talking. "Yes," the Headmaster began "I have a surprising announcement... as you all know Professor Snape has been substituting as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Now we have permanent teachers."  
  
A booing rose from the Slytherin table but it was overruled by the other houses yells. Harry, Ron and Hermione were cheering so loudly they were easily heard.  
  
"Coming back to Hogwarts after leaving two years ago... your teacher will be Professor Lupin and newly teaching..."  
  
He didn't get to finish his sentence. The entire Gryffindor table roared with cheers. Harry laughed as Neville Longbottom stood to applaud. Neville had really liked Professor Lupin, he'd been one of the few staff to appreciate him. Harry stood too.  
  
"May I finish?" Dumbledore asked chuckling to himself "Along with him is a good friend of Lupin's, Professor Sirius Black."  
  
Harry was stunned. The sound from the mass of students was not cheering but confusion. Gryffindors loved Professor Lupin but many were scared since Snape had log ago told everyone he was a werewolf. Yet Sirius was much worse... these children had seen Sirius as a criminal, a murderer.  
  
"Come on out gentlemen." Dumbledore said and Sirius entered the room with Professor Lupin beside him. The talk grew and Sirius looked a little embarrased.  
  
Professor Snape from across the room looked like he was going to have a heart failure. The rage in him was unmistakable... he'd lost his favorite position again, and to his enemies Black and Lupin. Yet, unknown to the students Snape found relief in them being here. He had done a lot of spy work for Dumbledore lately and he didn't need more work. He was as wanted as Remus and Sirius, Voldemort wanted him dead.  
  
"How come you didn't tell me?" Harry asked Sirius when he finally got the moment to ask.  
  
"I wanted to surprise you." Sirius said smiling "Surprised?"  
  
"Yeah, of course." Harry was so happy "Did you really... is he..."  
  
"Yes Harry," Remus cut in "It's over for now, that rat who killed your parents is in Azkaban."  
  
Everyone was so happy then. "You want to live with us now, I assume?" Sirius asked "Because my offer still stands."  
  
"Us?" Harry asked curiously.  
  
"Yes," Sirius said "Remus has moved into my place."  
  
"That's all right with you isn't it Harry?" Remus asked.  
  
"Yes! I think that's great for you Sirius," he looked at the two men and tried to let them know he understood.  
  
Remus nodded " I knew you were smart..." he said thoughtfully and looked at Sirius "James figured it out fast too Padfoot, didn't he?"  
  
"Yes." Sirius said " I think it's better now... until the next adventure."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: This might be the last chapter but I think I will make a sequel soon. Not sure yet but if you have any ideas please post them. 


End file.
